One thing I really don't understand is hashtagging on Facebook. Isn't that a Twitter thing, supposedly? Not that I would know...I don't have a Twitter. One life-consuming social network is enough, thanks. I have to say, though, that I've been guilty of the very thing I don't quite get, and I suppose my motivation must have been the same as it was for everyone else: it looked cool. Very 6th grade of me, I know. I've noticed there are many hashtags about various sorts of unique "problems" that people seem to be having: #firstworldproblems, #whitegirlproblems, #collegestudentproblems...before the hashtag craze, I had no idea that people had so many problems. At any rate, I figured why not add my own problems to the ever-growing pile? Ever heard of #triathleteproblems? Now you have.
1. Try on size small jacket. Examine self in mirror. Try to take off jacket. Fail miserably. Have to get pulled out of said jacket by friend because your arms have become too muscular from swimming and are no longer proportional to your body.
2. The jean dilemma. Waist fit=perfect. Ass fit=bustin' outa there. Ass fit=perfect. Waist fit=enough room for a party.
3. The internal debate: am I hardcore enough to have my name on the backside of my uniform?
4. Almost EVERYBODY who isn't a triathlete thinks you only do the Ironman.
5. The inevitable "Why are you always eating?" Or if you're with a guy, "I think you just ate more than me."
6. Bursting into a wildly inappropriate rap song in public because it's the one that got stuck in your head while running. "Left cheek right cheek..."
7. Race shirts: do I LOOK like a large?
8. The perfect snot rocket. Nail it, and you're awesome. Mess it up, and you're absolutely disgusting.
9. The person you're drafting behind on a ride is too skinny to block any wind.
10. That deflating feeling when you get passed by a lady with "50" written on her calf.
I'm realizing that many of these are quite gender-specific...maybe I should have called it #triathletegirlproblems. Oh well. This is only the tip of the iceberg. More to follow...
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